Working Out a Difficulty
I had a wonderful experience last night in my ongoing class that I would like to share with all of you. The teacher decided to have her assistant lead the class. The topic was that what gets in the way of being the best counselor we can be is our own distress, and that we would benefit greatly from clienting on this in our own sessions. We took turns thinking about what we do well as counselors and where we get stuck. During one persons' turn, the assistant teacher could tell she was stuck and wasn't able to do her best thinking as counselor. The client wasn't discharging, and the session was at a standstill. The assistant teacher stopped the session and asked for some time. She discharged about what was hard for her as counselor. Sure enough what came up was her own distress. As she discharged, she got a much better picture of her client's distress. They made a connection and got closer. The client knew that the counselor cared for her enough to get a hand to be a better counselor. It worked out best for all concerned, including everyone else in the class who saw first hand how our own distress gets in the way of our already inherently good counseling skills.
Amy Oldstein
Scarsdale, New York,
USA