Enjoying and Sharing Family Work
As I keep family work going in my home, I keep in mind the teaching of Fela Barclift [Regional Reference Person for North Brooklyn, New York, USA] during the Nigeria National Workshop of November 2016. Memories of the workshop are still fresh in my mind: the teaching; the interaction; the songs and dances; and, most important, those “wonder kids”—leading, “fighting,” ”beating,” and “winning.” It was a full dose of fun. We are all—father, mother, boys, and girls—enjoying family work in my home.
Fela emphasized that family work must follow certain guidelines for optimum benefit:
- It is basically about special time for the children. A distinct time is set aside to play with your child.
- The issue is not the play but the attention you give the children. If well managed, special time builds children’s confidence, gives them opportunities to make decisions and lead, and increases their sense of responsibility.
- Always explain clearly what special time is.
- Special time is for one child at a time.
- Special time must be provided for every child in the house.
- Try to meet in a parents’ support group as you build family work.
- Become better informed. Don’t let the family work publications rest; they are a great resource.
- Remember to do the following: Discharge first with an adult and be rested so you will be free of worries and tiredness. Set aside a short, defined period of time. Put the child in charge of his or her relationship with you during this time. Be willing to do anything he or she wants to do (as long as the activity is safe and not destructive). Focus your entire attention on the child. Notice everything about the child. Enjoy him or her; let your attention, interest, and approval show in your face. Expect new things to happen, and don’t be tempted to direct the play.
I have introduced family work to several families, and a stronger bond is being built between parents and their children. Let’s keep this work afloat and flourishing.
Port Harcourt, Rivers State, Nigeria