Successfully Discharging on Pain
I want to share a victory:
I discharged a lot in the past month about getting an IUD (intrauterine device, a type of birth control), which can be extremely painful to have inserted. I reached out to many Co-Counseling leaders in my Area* for help in thinking about pain, pain medication, and medical procedures.
Wow, I had so many Co-Counseling sessions about pain and fear of pain! It was a chance to discharge a lot of fear—especially about my body and sexism—that would have been hard to access normally. I decided not to use any pain medication whatsoever for the procedure. I had my appointment last week, and it went so well!
I was able to tell my partner what I needed from him at the appointment, especially in terms of discharge, even though he’s not a Co-Counselor. I explained that the way I see it, pain isn’t bad; it’s the body’s natural way to give us information. I said that the hardest part for me was just feeling all the fear. I asked him to remember that everything was fine and that when I cried or said “ow,” it was helping me.
I talked with my doctor and explained that I knew it would go better for me if I could cry and say “ow,” that I knew she would do a great job, and that she didn’t need to worry about me. She said, “Yes, you say and do whatever you need to, and I will only stop if you say ‘stop.’”
It was good for me to be in counselor mode and think about my doctor. It helped me keep my attention out. I was really present—feeling the pain and keeping my attention on my doctor at the same time. I didn’t worry about my partner’s feelings; I just let him support me and felt his presence and care.
The procedure did really hurt, and I was able to stay present and feel each sensation. I was able to discharge a lot before and after in the exam room, and a little during the procedure itself.
I feel proud of how I made it go exactly as I wanted it to. I have learned that pain just hurts; it doesn’t kill you. This is just what Tim Jackins said at a workshop I went to.
The next time something like this comes up, I know that I will feel more confident about asking for allies, discharging on fear of pain, and deciding to really notice my body (including pain and discomfort!). Woooohoooo!
Anonymous
Seattle, Washington, USA